To ease my conscience, I must let go
by RichardIII1955
Summary: George can't take the guilt anymore. When the ghost of his friend Lennie calls out to him, George finally knows what he has to do, regardless of what it may do to others and himself...


_I was bored so I wrote the first thing that came into my mind, and here it is. Enjoy! _

…

"_No, Lennie," I said softly. "Look down there, like you can almost see the place." My friend turned obediently to where I was pointing and his excited, loyal eyes landed on a small clump of trees down below. "I'm looking, George!" he cried excitedly. "Look!" he pointed gleefully. "I can see it! I can see it, George! Look!"_

"_Yeah… I can see it." I mumbled stiffly, looking down at the black Lugar in my hand. "Do it now…" my mind urged. "Now, while he ain't lookin'!"_

_My hand tightened on the gun, my arm raised, and I fired. "George!" Lennie cried. __**"George!"**_

…_**..**_

Sweat dripped. Trickled. Ice cold. Boiling hot. Where am I? Lennie… Realisation hit me like a splash of water in the morning. A dream. It was all a dream. A nightmare. I need to get out. The moonlight flitted through the gaps between the walls, and my bed sheets were damp and tangled. I have to get out… I have to.

Pulling back the bedcovers, which were now showing damp patches and dirt, I steadied myself as I stood up on my two feet, now quaking with fear. I looked down at my hand. The hand that had held the gun. I wanted it to die. I wanted to die. This hand had held the weapon that had killed my best friend, my only friend, and thanks to it I now had nothing.

But I knew how I could change that…

…

"George…" Lennie's voice giggled to me eerily. "Come find me George!'

My head snapped round.

"George…" it called again. "Where are you, George?"

This was too much. I had to get out.

I burst out of the ranch door, my feet kicking up dust behind me. The moonlight illuminated the way.

My hand was clenched round the object that would end my grief.

It was as if I had been expected. Trees parted for me as I entered. Wind stopped whistling and all went quiet.

My foot shook as I took my first step into the place where my world had ended.

Sinking to my knees in despair, I wept openly over the tombstone of my best and only friend. It read: HERE LIES LENNIE SMALL. BELOVED FRIEND AND COMPANION. MAY HE REST IN PEACE.

The inscription could in no doubt no longer be read, as my tears of anguish, anger and hate blurred it entirely in a matter of seconds. I hugged it desperately; as if I let go of it I would surely drown.

Sobs eventually ceased to wrack my body and I looked down at what was in my hand. "Finally…" I thought. "I shall be alone no longer…

"I'm here George…" I turned my aching head to the sound. "I'm here."

To my right, Lennie sat cross-legged and he inspected an item in his lap. A hat: stained by blood. As he looked up at me, he turned his head slightly, and to my horror, blood was seeping out endlessly of the gaping hole that had been made by a bullet. Made by a gun. Made by me…

The golden locks of hair around the hole were singed and black and burnt. I gagged violently and stumbled backwards. Lennie gave a great big smile at me, not seeming to notice my obvious pain and discomfort at the sight of the fatal injury I had caused him those few months ago- that to me had felt like eternity.

"I thought you'd never find me, George…" he whispered happily, his eyes shining.

I staggered to my feet. "I'm here now…" I told him.

Looking down at the object that would end my grief, I turned to face my dead companion's ghost. "What's that, George?" he asked curiously.

Taking a deep breath, and staring into translucent, yet still bright baby blue eyes, I held out my saviour. "It'll bring me to you, Lennie…" I whispered. "I'm comin' home."

"To tend the rabbits with me, George?"

"Yes."

Hearing his laughter of delight again after so long told me I was doing the right thing. I looked up at his pale, grey form that was of a ghost, and I saw that his eyes of baby blue shone like the sun. They were the only light that I could see, for they were truly mesmerising- loyalty and devotion still clearly there in those eyes. "My God," I thought. "Those eyes. How much I love those eyes."

I wrapped my arms around his neck, not caring if they went straight through them, for a brief moment before I laced my fingers into his ghostlike hand, and clenched it tightly, never letting go.

"I'll be waitin' for you, George. I'll come to take you home…"

**Bang. **

…

In the darkness of night, a lone light could be seen flickering in the distance. Slim rubbed his eyes and tried to focus on it as he made his way to the drinking fountain. As he stepped out of the ranch door into the dark and the open scenery, he thought he saw two figures standing there, their arms wrapped around each other. Slim stared in astonishment as the shorter of the two turned around and smiled at him a true happy smile.

"George?" Slim whispered in bewilderment. "What are ya doin' out here in the cold?"

He tried to coax the figure into the ranch with him, but they just simply laughed and shook their head.

"I'm with Lennie now, Slim." He stated, motioning to the taller figure at his left. "I'm goin' home, but I'll see ya soon."

Slim looked at the stronger, sturdier man at George's left, his smiled and waved. "Hello Slim," he greeted cheerfully. "George and me are goin' to tend them rabbits now!"

Slim gave a small smile. He chuckled and nodded his head.

The ghost of Lennie then frowned. "I'm sorry I killed your pup, Slim…." He mumbled, looking down at the ground ashamed. "But he's here with me- look!"

The ranch hand turned his head to see a translucent puppy bound down towards them. He leapt at Slim, and the man noticed that the puppy's legs went straight through him. He really was dead.

The puppy then turned and leapt at Lennie instead, and Slim noticed that the puppy didn't go through him. They really were ghosts: he wasn't imagining a thing. This was real.

George watched with a smile and a laugh, before he turned to the surprisingly calm Slim.

"Thank you, Slim," he whispered with sincere gratitude and gratefulness. "For everything…"

With the final goodbye made, George turned and walked back to Lennie's side. Lennie placed the ghost puppy on the floor and wrapped an arm around his friend, who in return did likewise. They turned their heads in unison and smiled one last smile at Slim before walking into the distance as they had done together the puppy trotting happily beside them.

Slim watched as the two spirits faded into the dark. He felt, for some strange reason, like a great weight had been lifted off his conscience, even though he wasn't the one who had killed a friend. George was at peace. He was dead, but at peace, and if that was good enough for him, then it was good enough for Slim too.

Smiling, Slim turned and walked back into the ranch, his mind eased at the fact that George was no longer alone and that he was happy.

…..

At the top of the hill that looked down at the valley, the ghosts of two friends closer than brothers watched the figure of their friend- and the only person who had understood how close they actually were- retreat into to the bunkhouse and into his bed. They looked at each other and smiled. Though they had had to die, peace would now hopefully reign over this troubled place.

The puppy squirmed joyfully in Lennie's lap, and in one swift moment, his big paw like had stroked it from head to tail. They wouldn't have to fear him hurting anyone now. Life's miseries had left them forever, and now they could go to heaven and live the life they had dreamed there together

Climbing to his feet, George stood and offered Lennie his hand. The two then took one last look at the life they had left behind before they turned and walked into the light of heaven, Lennie clutching at George's arm- like he had always done.

"Lennie, I'm gonna tell ya somethin'"

"What, George?"

"You know I ain't never been mad at you?"

"Sure, George. I know that now."

"Good."

"George?"

"Yeah, Lennie?"

"Tell me about them rabbits again, George. I missed hearing you tellin' me about it. You always tell it better than me."

George gave a great big smile and he wrapped and arm around him. Lennie still clung to his arm.

"Sure, Lennie. Sure."

"How's it gonna be?"

"We're gonna have a vegetable patch, and pigs and chickens…"

"And rabbits, George! Don't forget them rabbits!"

"Yes, Lennie, rabbits….

"And I get to tend the rabbits!"

"Yeah…"

As they entered the light, with the puppy following, George and Lennie smiled at each other, and spoke freely about their new life, not having to worry about the opinions and harsh judgements of the world.

They were finally free.

….


End file.
